/feels/ - Advice & Venting

>>113510
Turn bathing into a romantic routine like the way you would turn it into a game for a kid. Light candles, put romantic music on, and share a bath every day. Tell her you really like the intimacy of bathing together.

my boyfriend is perfect and treats me so well but i have been obsessing over the fact that all our children are going to have his dark eyes. I think his eyes suite him well and he's very handsome but I want children with blue eyes.
it's so vein and horrible that i care about this, I don't know how to stop obsessing over it. i want to not care.

>>113524
What color are your eyes?

>>113539
greenish-blue

>>113524
nona I have the same issue. His eyes are brown and I just want blue eyed kids… Truly the best you can hope for is that they are healthy and strong. If you can look in his eyes and love him for being perfect the way he is, you will love your children even more.

I never knew where we stood. I would tell myself that I did, I could fool myself but I guess I always expected that you would leave me. In the back of my mind I knew the whole thing was a mistake but you were always there when I closed my eyes. When your fucking tattoo artist was acting weird and you let slip that you guys used to bang I should have just left, but I was convinced I'd just be alone again.
The past few years have been hard. There's a space between us and it's just grown and grown and now we can't reach each other over the gap. It's ironic that I failed that interview to get a different job to fix this because everything imploded anyway.
Every time I feel the space on my finger where the ring was my stomach does a little flip. I'm nauseous and I'm dizzy and I'm so scared of being alone in this house, but what else is there to do? We've done this before but I think there's no going back this time. It doesn't matter that you kept telling me I was perfect because I wasn't, and we both know it, and while I can work on my anger and my bitterness and try to communicate how I'm feeling, I can't just FIX everything about me.
I still remember what you wore to our first date that you insisted wasn't a date. I remember trying to make small talk and pesto cheese bread zombie dicks and sunshine on your hair. I remember how nervous we both were the day we got engaged because we both knew what was coming. I don't think I can go back to the Ringling. I don't think I can go back to Busch Gardens. Who's going to tell me about roller coaster manufacturers? Who's going to tell me to have a good day at work? Who am I going to ask if we need dumb things at home goods?
But who's going to draw away when I try to kiss them? Who's going to stay out all night with their friends, who's going to not come home? Who's going to tell me that my work stress is ruining me and also that they can't handle being told about it? Who's going to tell me they want kids, and help come up with names, and then change their mind after we're married? Who's going to tell me the only way we could make it work is if I left my parents all by themselves as they get older and I've TALKED with you about how anxious my mom's memory problems make me, and you flat-out tell me we have to move to Cali or New York or something and nobody can afford that. My sister already left them; I can't. I can't just leave them and fuck you for issuing these ultimatums.
I can't even work up the Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

You think I hate you, but I love you so much. I just suck at showing it. Well, I can't show it; I don't feel worthy. I'm sure that I come off as aloof as a result, but I don't hate you. Far from it. I could never hate you. You'll think I do and I'll hate myself for it. Let's hate me together.

>>102262
>>103315
>>103973
>>104357
>>105278
>>105621
>>110808
>>107099
>>113014
>>113412


here is a collection of the posts i wish were towards me.
delulu 4 lyfe! :>

Dear mom,

i'm sorry for losing my temper. I love you

>>113413
I wish I had the guts to let them know but we haven't texted in two years and so I feel it would be awkward tell out of nowhere… But I will if I happen to see them in flesh. I'm just making excuses aren't I

>>113279
Proud of you for getting help, nona! I'm not sure where you are in the world, but some places allow pharmacies to extend prescriptions if there is a gap like you're describing. If you go to the same one, they should have records of your meds (or you can bring your empty bottle to show it) and explain your situation that you need another ~3 weeks of pills to cover you until you can see your doctor. Going cold turkey off of SSRIs/other meds is hell.

>>113329
I found a therapist I actually liked and I felt comfortable around her too. Now I have to go through all of it again. I have stuff I wanna tell her. They have me scheduled with one but it won’t be for another month :/
>>113342
Thank you nona <3
>>113345
They gave me another prescription thank god but it’s still not the right dose so it’s only doing like half its job.

>>113366
I've been there nona… I had a therapist I loved and she retired shortly after. Sometimes Im scared therapists get based just before they quit because they arent scared of losing their license. But I think you will have better luck than me! You're strong nona! We're all rooting for you!!!!!

good luck nona, rooting for you. I had to go to the free government issue psychiatrist because I couldn't afford my old one anymore and I had to wait like half a year but when I talked to her she was really nice and she fixed my meds.

>>113432
Considering many of us came to these kinds of boards to get away from men due to their shitty echo chamber attitudes about us, it is really shitty of them for them to come onto our sites then bitch about us. I don't go onto theirs, so why come onto ours? It shows how much of attentionwhores they are while accusing us of it.

>>113441
We need to start spamming their sites with mutilated dicks as retaliation

>>113444
KEK reddit? The home of trannies and coomer men? The place where femcel subreddits get banned but female rape and gore ones stay up? Go back to posting on your groomer subreddits troon.

I left Reddit because they kept being assholes to me when I talked about being a csa survivor.

>>113432
i have the original that this came from

>6'5
like clockwork

>>113305
>he's like 6'5 and I'm 5'3
It's not like a 5'3 guy couldn't overpower you if he really wanted.
>he's really into hentai.
Run

Sounds like bro has been reading his hentai and wants to have an irl hentai-style relationship lmao

ngl i hear about bi men fucking men but i don't really hear about bi men seriously dating other men, the only "bi" men i see dating other men tend to exclusively from that point only date other men likely bc they're closet homos and do't want to fully admit it
but if hes into hentai he might just be an actual degen who'll fuck anything, regardless i'd trust your gut anona

>>113308
yikes

I think also this has potential to feed into my love for tragic romance stories:

1. he doesn't want me, while i'm left with no choice but to yearn/move on
2. he wants me, never tells me, and we both want each-other while nothing happens
3. he wants me, we have a sweet summer romance, he moves away and we both hurt over our losses

its horrible, but its still so beautiful to experience pain in such a sweet way.

Hi anon, I had a similar situation begin in 2020. Following my confession, his rejection was also unclear and we had the most ambiguously romantic, emotionally intense, asexual, and confusing relationship I have ever experienced. My feelings for him haunted me for years, I only learned our "break up" was an actual break up this year and upon reuniting I was only tortured more.
What's more I only got to kiss him 4 years after we met, 2 years post-break up. And then he was abruptly out of my life forever.
Not saying it could go exactly like this for you, but please know that messing with ambiguity can be a nightmare. It is romantic in theory and would be a great movie, but it's terrible to live in real life. The unfulfilled feelings will gnaw at you until your insides rot.

Just stay platonic and find someone who wants to and can be with you, nona.

>>113294

we actually talked about it last night, and he told me that he actually did like me, but he's just not sure about dating because the whole falling in love then having to leave thing. i'm going to attempt to listen to you, but i'm pretty sure the moment he lets me im going to fold.

I think you are underestimating old people. You could meet your lifetime people in your 40s or 50s and get at least a solid couple decades of friendship out of it.

>>113228
Honest to God the worst part of loneliness is the bitter tunnel vision we get out of it. The human brain isn't meant for isolation. We get really stuck and stubborn only affirming the strictness of our beliefs and biases. Trust that although your pain is very real for how you've seemingly "missed the bus" at different life stages, that there are options that are out there that will surprise you in the best way. You don't have to believe it, you just have to do more. That's the trouble with it, you tell yourself it's some circumstantial or existential problem out of your control, deadline's already passed, because that's easier than saying "I could try something new to get a different result/test my theory".

There's another bus coming, nona.

>>113257
I really like Hopper's art. For me it evokes peace, rather than loneliness, for some reason.

>>113229
In my experience, no. I live rural and everyone here is 40+ boomers and they live miles away. Growing up, I had not one friend. I commute to the city for work now and have a much easier time making friends.

>>113257
I feel the exact same way as OP. Sure you can claim that it might not be completely hopeless, but that's just not what I'm experiencing. So where should people like us even begin to search for these 'lifetime people' that somehow we missed finding the first time? What are the steps? I swear it's not for a lack of trying. I have tried so many times to get involved with all kinds of groups and individuals both online and off. While it's not so difficult to find an acquaintance who will act friendly once or twice, they couldn't care less about actually getting to know me as a person, and regardless of if they show any actual interest they just end up ghosting me everytime. I just want people I can feel comfortable around. Who skip the small talk nonsense and can enjoy an honest discussion of interests and opinions with. Someone who you can randomly message eachother anytime and discuss your personal lives and thoughts and they are willing to listen. Why is it so impossible to find this situation? It just seems to me like after you're an adult, people stop trying to get to know or care about others. It's as if true friendship is a childhood thing reserved for the lucky few, and I've started to consider that it may possibly be just a fictional concept in general.

>>113285
>"I cannot persuade myself that a beneficent and omnipotent God would have designedly created parasitic wasps with the express intention of their feeding within the living bodies of Caterpillars." - Charles Darwin

lol

The only good animals are tropical birds. Look at the cool little displays they build!

>>113283
https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/article/butterflies-behaving-badly-what-they-dont-want-you-to-know
..

>>113290
This made me think.. When a straight woman says she's disgusted with submission like straight sex acts then humans are sadists and of course like to taunt her with it and wanna see her break and submit. Rape = initiation into femininity. Unfortunately humans yes including women don't hide the fact that they see nothing wrong with rape at all as much as they do and subconsciously they seem to adhere to biological gender "roles" if mentally woman is not into submission then she can't have straight sex cause she would see it as terrorizing. Humans love to taunt others with rape and fantasise about putting women in their place that's why I regret posting this fact cause moids mind find it pleasing

>>113291
Sorry I have fear of rape esp it being a part of womanhood. I wouldn't even date a moid cause its like accepting rape

>>112070
That being said, I had a big issue with my previous ex's ex because they were emotionally involved with each other the entire duration of our relationship. I was being retarded and should have just left him tbh.

Jealous over exes? Just wait until your Nigel cheats on you…

>>112601
Lel

>>112601

I suppose it would have been worse if mine had cheated with someone hotter, but I found out he was the community dick for his uggo friends.

Yes, it's completely understandable, but try not to let it consume you. Hatred and passion/love are only a fine line apart and it's easy for you to start focusing on how amazing and attractive the exes were instead of stoking the fire in your own sense of love towards yourself. This will make you bitter and your current partner WILL taste it on you over time, even if you never talk about it. Trust me. The best thing you can do when you're in the thick of it is trying to convert the hatred into a complex about why you're better and how you can do everything they did well, but in your own unique way, plus more. However you want to spin it. This will eventually take you to a state of peace where it'll be easier to see them as just other random humans your partner ran into in this big wide world.

>painting is titled "Time Saving Truth From Falsehood and Envy"
>"The naked figure of Truth is held aloft by her father, Time, who with his scythe subdues Falsehood, in her fine apparel and dissembling mask, while the baleful figure of Envy recedes, protesting."

>>113225
Going s't o going to be ebe okay
okay nona dislexexia is difficult to dealw ith with but through ough perseveranceanceperser you can makeit it!

i feel that dyslexia is the worst

>>113225
just use office or any other alternative that provides a dictionary

Why'd you want Google to know all your posts? Well perhaps it's nothing important, but there is not a single reason to assume they didn't spy on you, maybe even fingerprint.

What OS do you use? LibreOffice is more or less cross platform and will do the job. But it takes relatively much space.

On the more lightweight side, on Linux mousepad is good and has spell checking plugin, but you need a recent version, I don't remember when the feature was added. I also know gedit and pluma have spell check.

Idk about other systems. Afaik notepad++ is open source and has spell check if you use windows. If mac, then I guess just look up table of text editors on wiki and get anything open source that has spellcheck.